What Do Black Men Think Of Black Women?


This will be short and sweet. It was just a conversation I had with someone today that I felt like sharing. A friend of mine tried to set me up with this guy she knows who has ‘got it going on’. I told her no but she gave him my number anyway and he called me this afternoon and we got to talking.

After the awkwardness was over, I spent about 20 minutes listening to him talk about himself and what he has achieved and what he wanted to do with his life and how his career makes him live the life style he wants. All in all, not bad if I was looking for an idiot who likes the sound of his own voice. He then asked me a very simple question; so, what is your story? I replied and said, I do not have a story. He laughed and asked me why I was single so I told him there really wasn’t an answer to that question as there are many factors. He then asked me if I had any trust issues. I said no. Did I have any grudges I hold against men? I replied no. He then asked, do you have any kids? My answer obviously was no. He asked how old I was and I replied. I was getting kind of annoyed by this stage because really, get to the point right? But wait, he wasn’t done. not by a long shot!

After the spanish inquisition , he asked me if I liked chicken to which I replied not really because I found chicken boring. This man on my phone then goes: wait, so you don’t have any issues or hate for men, you’re more than 25 years old, have your own place and a job and have no kids, you’re not a big fan of chicken, you work out and you sound generally very sane. ARE YOU SURE YOU’RE BLACK??  Believe me, I was just as surprised and more than a little outraged!. I did not mince my words when I told him where to shove it and start dating women instead of little girls but as usual, that conversation has been on replay in my head and since I’m all drugged up and have too much caffeine in my body to fall asleep, I decided, can I please ask this question?

To all the black men out there who read my blog, is that how you really view black women? That as long as she is sane and has a head on her shoulders she’s not black? I know some black women that have kids and are still holding it down being independent and not relying on the government. I know black women this including myself who have been lied to and cheated on by men in the past and still aren’t bitter or going around hating on men. I know black women that are strong independent and have their shit together.

If every one of those people I’ve described sounds too good to be true for the black men, then you lot really do not deserve us do you? You cannot expect every woman you meet to be a no good waste girl because that is what you are used to. You cannot expect us all to be fat and live in council flats and not be able to hold down jobs because that is what you’re used to. You cannot expect all of us to be career gold diggers and hoes because that is what you’re used to. All I’m saying is, there is a new black woman out there and you my ‘brothers’ need to start catching up!

6 responses »

  1. urgh … what’s sad though is that I do believe that a lot of ‘people’ in general, not just black men; have that stereotype of all black women. Which is sad. Guys I talk to act like I’m a dying breed because I’m doing damn well for myself, better than most of them actually … and I don’t understand it because I know a lot of black women who are successfully doing well for themselves. It’s annoying but what can we do eh! x

  2. Tell me about it! I canot tell you how many times i’ve had that as well but Stace, if our own race think that about us, what hope do we have of not being seen as stereotypical black females by other races? Charity begins at home so to speak!.

  3. Well the next time you end up having a conversation with a black neanderthal, ask them if they ever take trips to the city in London, their are vast amounts of beautiful black queens helping to in rich the nation’s economy.

    Alot of black men are indoctrinated, its a dame shame, they fall victem to the very stereo type cast open them for 100’s of years.

  4. A lot of people believe what they’re told by others or bad examples. All you can do is search for the person that seeks the person you are, not seeing the world through the cracked lens of stereotypes.

  5. Black Woman
    Naked woman, black woman

    Clothed with your colour which is life,
    with your form which is beauty

    In your shadow I have grown up; the
    gentleness of your hands was laid over my eyes.

    And now, high up on the sun-baked
    pass, at the heart of summer, at the heart of noon,
    I come upon you, my Promised Land,
    And your beauty strikes me to the heart
    like the flash of an eagle.

    Naked woman, dark woman

    Firm-fleshed ripe fruit, sombre raptures
    of black wine, mouth making lyrical my mouth
    Savannah stretching to clear horizons,
    savannah shuddering beneath the East Wind’s
    eager caresses

    Carved tom-tom, taut tom-tom, muttering
    under the Conqueror’s fingers

    Your solemn contralto voice is the
    spiritual song of the Beloved.

    Naked woman, dark woman

    Oil that no breath ruffles, calm oil on the
    athlete’s flanks, on the flanks of the Princes of Mali
    Gazelle limbed in Paradise, pearls are stars on the
    night of your skin

    Delights of the mind, the glinting of red
    gold against your watered skin

    Under the shadow of your hair, my care
    is lightened by the neighbouring suns of your eyes.

    Naked woman, black woman,
    I sing your beauty that passes, the form
    that I fix in the Eternal,

    Before jealous fate turn you to ashes to
    feed the roots of life.

    By Sedar Senghor

    I shall forever utter my profound admiration for the Black Woman!

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